The Sweetness of "Wait"

Desperately, helplessly, longingly, I cried.

Quietly, patiently, lovingly, He replied.

I pleaded, and I wept for a clue to my fate,

And the Master so gently said, “Child, you must wait.”

 

“Wait? You say wait??” my indignant reply.

“Lord, I need answers, I need to know why.

...

“My future, and all to which I can relate

Hangs in the balance, and you tell me ‘wait’?

...

I heard this poem by Russell Kelfer when I was in my second year of college. I wrote it in my journal and have gone back to read it many times. It feels like this has been my exchange with God lately as I wait for an answer about my return date to Mozambique.

 

... Lord I’ve been asking, and this is my cry:

“I’m weary of asking: I need a reply!”

 

Then quietly, softly, I learned of my fate

As my Master replied once again, “You must wait.”

So I slumped in my chair; defeated and taut

And grumbled to God; “So I’m waiting, for what?”

Why should I have to wait so long to receive a return date from the AIM office? What could be more important than going back to share the Gospel with the lost? What am I supposed to tell supporters when they ask for an update? That I know absolutely nothing about my return and I'm just sitting around at home waiting?

 

He seemed then to kneel and His eyes met with mine

And He tenderly said, “I could give you a sign.

I could shake the heavens, darken the sun,

Raise the dead, cause the mountains to run.

“All you see I could give, and pleased you would be.

You would have what you want, but you wouldn’t know Me.

You’d not know the depth of My love for each saint;

You’d not know the power that I give to the faint.

 

“You’d not learn to see through clouds of despair;

You’d not learn to trust, just by knowing I’m there.

You’d not know the joy of resting in Me,

When darkness and silence was all you could see.

 

“You would never experience that fullness of love

As the peace of My Spirit descends like a dove.

You would know that I give, and I save, for a start,

But you’d not know the depth of the beat of My heart.

 

“The glow of My comfort late in the night;

The faith that I give when you walk without sight;

The depth that’s beyond getting just what you ask

From an infinite God who makes what you have last.

...

“So be silent, my child, and in time you will see

That the greatest of gifts is to get to know Me.

And though oft’ may My answers seem terribly late, 

My most precious answer of all….is still…wait.” 

by Russell Kelfer

https://patientlywaitingongod.com/2015/03/22/wait-poem-by-russell-kelfer/

Waiting patiently for the unknown is not one of my strengths. Yet what choice do I have but to trust God right now? In the waiting, He has blessed me with extra time with my family.

My brother and I made a lemon meringue pie yesterday. It took time to make and even after it came out of the oven looking beautiful and inviting, we still had to wait hooooours for it to cool in the fridge. After waiting the appropriate time, we were finally rewarded with a sweet and mouthwatering flavor. The wait was worth it.

If God wants me back in Mozambique, He will bring me back in His perfect timing. If the sweet reward of waiting is knowing "the depth of the beat of His heart," then it's worth the wait.

Sometimes I get anxious or nervous. I want a yes, a return date, or at least something to go on. But His "most precious answer of all... is still... wait."