Rachel's Reflections

Why do I doubt and worry and stress? Because life can seem stressful at times, especially when it came to car and insurance shopping this past week. I know intellectually that God is faithful, yet I revealed my doubt in Him by stressing myself out with worry. I found out, it was completely unnecessary. My brother has been gracious enough to let me use his car while he finished his last year of college, but he graduates in a few weeks. My time to shop for a car was running short. What could I even afford in this current, inflated market? I stressed out about it last week. Then a gentleman from my new church called on Saturday, "I found a great car for you. A 2010 Subaru Forester in great condition and within your price range. You can go test drive it this afternoon." I felt elated! I even laughed on my way to look at the car. I had joked with my dad weeks ago that a Subaru would be a nice size (not too big and not too small for the ministry) but the chances of that happening w

Tears streamed down my face and my body shook. I thought I was past all this. When was the last time I had one of these reactions? I didn't even realize I had trauma in this area to react to. Okay, I knew something was there, but I had never faced those feelings full-on before. What was the cause of this emotional turmoil? In one word: Church. I haven't had a real church family in a while now. I've been crying out to God about this, begging Him to give me community, a Christian fellowship, but He didn't answer my prayers. I tried small group after Bible study after book study and they kept falling through or not fitting quite right. Finally, when I started feeling settled in a church and in a small group, I knew it was only temporary because I would be moving to Metro Detroit and have to start all over again. Now that I'm in Metro Detroit for ministry, my first priority is on finding a church family to plug into. But that's the trigger point. Coincidentally, (as